Advice | Carolyn Hax: Spouses can’t agree on where to live post-retirement

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Advice | Carolyn Hax: Spouses can’t agree on where to live post-retirement
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Advice | Carolyn Hax: We are living in a subdivision that has none of the things either of us wants. How do we reach a compromise?

There is no solution besides each of you caring what the other wants.

If neither of you looks out for the other’s interests, then each of you fights for your own as you live out your days Sartre-like in your subdivision. Or you separate.This, too: Your husband can adapt your setting to meet his needs more easily than you can adapt his setting to meet yours. Studiously declining to engage with neighbors and shops, easy. Shopping and gossiping with trees, not so much.

As long as I’m daydreaming with your money, you can also cash in your subdivision family home for two small homes that become your city and country places.

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