Ambivalence, which essentially means having conflicting feelings about something, makes many people uncomfortable. But it is a normal part of change, experts say.
“It’s being able to see various options and possibilities and to choose among them,” Miller said. “Ambivalence is actually a process of evaluation, comparing the relative positives and negatives of possible choices.”
has found that writing about your ambivalence regarding an important goal significantly reduces the distress caused by ambivalence.Think about what matters most to you in life: autonomy, comfort, health, purpose, something else. Then, if you consider “how these values fit with your current behavior and the change behavior, you may find some foundation for making the change,” DiClemente said. “We’re always in a state of negotiating with ourselves.
If you want to start exercising, for example, you might use statements such as: “I want to be fit and active to play with my children or grandchildren,” “I enjoy tennis and could exercise by playing more often,” or, “If I exercise frequently, I may be able to ditch my [blank] medication.”has found that “change talk” significantly increased during motivational interviewing among people who had problem-drinking habits and contributed to a reduction in their drinking over an eight-week period.
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