Sometimes the most unconventional methods have the most promising results... 💥
? Smoking cessation? Panda habitat preservation? I can, in 30 different ways. That's why I'm your boss.
Our goal here is to build a balanced organization, so I also need you to take time for the other side of narcissistic self-aggrandizement: credit-hogging. Yes, without you, nothing could have shipped at all. Make sure to remind everyone of your value in every meeting. Walk around, if you're not remote, and say things like, “When we added emoji to the litter-scooping notifications, that really put this thing over the edge.
If all goes well, we'll spend the run-up to launch squashing bugs and alternating between fantasies of glory and a morbid fear of being ignored. Then comes the big moment. A launch day is very special. You might think it's an opportunity to throw a party and celebrate. But experienced product leaders know that this is the day you wake up and have a huge fight with your romantic partner, whom you've neglected for months while you hauled this bundle of code and missteps into the light.
Once you've stomped out of the house, head to the office, where, after doing some light credit-hogging, you should spend as much time as possible onengaging in PLR, or post-launch reloading. While the vast majority of humans will be utterly indifferent to your announcement, you must drill in on the one or two who offer reactions that fall short of total excitement. Be sure to blow up any criticism or misunderstanding, no matter how small, into a flat-out organizational panic.
Inevitably, right away, the app's login function will break. As a society we are incapable of authenticating users. It's a tragedy, one of our greatest failings. And when we fix that issue we will forget to turn server logging back on, so we will have no idea who's using the app.
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