Dear How to Do It: I just want to be able to say no without making him feel awful.
If your partner feels like they need to get you off with their oral ministrations, have a talk about what orgasm means in sex.
We’re in our 40s.To add to that, I’ve never had an orgasm , and as I’ve gotten older my libido has seriously dropped, so I’m in a less-intense state than when I was younger. My boyfriend has erectile dysfunction, so he rarely comes in me; and of course, he’s worried about getting soft, though he knows I won’t complain, so that can psych him out. So both those factors are part of the reason why we don’t have more juice in our engines in the middle/end of sex.
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