At the time, she was fighting for treatments, but in the year that has passed, something has changed for Bishop.
Pamela Bishop, 47, of Knoxville, Tennessee,and how it forced her to retire from her position as a director of a research center at 46. She told TODAY about the new outlook she has on her health struggles.Last year, I was mourning what I had lost, the life of “active mom.” At the time, I was constantly fighting for treatments, and I tried everything that even offered a sliver hope.
Retiring at an early age and grappling with so many health issues was exhausting, and I started therapy. At first, I spent much of my time crying and grieving my losses. My therapist mentioned the idea of acceptance and that felt impossible to me. How could I accept this horrible fate? For two years I experimented on myself, trying so many medications and therapies.
Then I decided to stop treating myself as a guinea pig. I wondered if I was giving up. But I didn’t feel like I was. I didn’t feel suicidal or like I wanted to die. I just simply did not want to fight anymore. It was difficult. My whole life, I fought for what I wanted. As a professor, I fought hard to start my own research center. But now I was letting it all go.
By accepting that I am sick, though, I have also embraced joy in life. Long COVID means I have very little energy for most things. Searching for cures and fighting against being sick consumed so much energy. Now I can devote myself to my family, to my container garden, to watching and nurturing my chickens. When I have good days, I embrace them. When I have bad days, I rest. I don’t enjoy being sick. But two and a half years into it, I know this is my life.
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