Miss Manners: She requested a gift. I thought I’d misheard.

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Miss Manners: She requested a gift. I thought I’d misheard.
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I offered something nice for her birthday, and she countered.

What if you are given something you don’t particularly want? Worse — what if you therefore missed the opportunity to get other people to buy you what you do want? Miss Manners finds this attitude toward the expected generosity of others to be unseemly, but it is the premise on which your friend’s suggestion is based.

Cynics sneer at the adage, “It’s the thought that counts,” thinking it hypocritical, when what really counts is getting stuff for free. Or better yet, eliminating the danger of disappointment and the nuisance of thinking entirely by substituting money for objects.

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