I put a lot of effort into these teas, and my friends think nothing of canceling at the last minute.
I’ve gone to increasing lengths to formalize the event in the hope that that would build more commitment into the responses, with no success. For the most recent tea, I gave out formal handwritten invitations three weeks in advance, requested and received responses two weeks in advance, and still went from seven expected guests to four within hours of the event.
It’s also been suggested to me that asking someone to bring a dish will make her presence feel more essential and thus make her more likely to attend. I haven’t wanted to pursue that course, either, because I very much prefer to host the tea rather than just organize it. How can I, while being mannerly myself, request or instill a sense of commitment in my friends’ responses to my invitations?Stop inviting the ones who consistently fail to show. That will likely be the only way to teach your guests commitment.
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