Miss Manners: For years, I’ve wondered about this conversation I overheard about myself

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Miss Manners: For years, I’ve wondered about this conversation I overheard about myself
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My mom and my sibling apparently kept a secret from me, but they won’t admit it.

Had the conversation happened yesterday, Miss Manners might share your suspicion about their inability to remember the topic. But years later?

Likely, they really have forgotten — as should you. If that is impossible, at least consider that a secret you do not know can be good as well as bad: Perhaps they were discussing your surprise birthday party.Whenever I throw a dinner party, I always make sure to provide tasty vegetarian dishes for those so inclined. I even make room for vegans, who can be quite demanding. But my vegetarian and vegan friends never provide a meat dish for anyone when they host a meal.

I think a little reciprocity is in order. People can always provide doggie bags if they are afraid of having a piece of fried chicken left over.Miss Manners realizes that not everyone with special dietary needs is polite about not drawing attention to them at the table. But that problem will not be solved by asking hosts — who may be vegetarian for religious or health reasons that would be a serious impediment to what you propose — to serve meat.

You add vegetarian dishes to ensure that people have something to eat, not to make available an endless number of choices.I have a friend, who, when invited to dinner at my home, fills her plate but doesn’t eat everything on it. Being sick and tired of watching my hard work and expensive groceries end up in the garbage, is there a polite way to ask her to go easy and then have seconds if she is still hungry?No, but there is a solution to your problem, which has the added benefit of being more formal and decorous: Fill your guests’ plates yourself.

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