Miss Manners: Are festive gifts an appropriate response to a death?

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Miss Manners: Are festive gifts an appropriate response to a death?
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I find it awkward that my friend buys sports gear for the bereaved.

Miss Manners is aware that many would rather have a celebration of life than a commemoration of death. But that still means celebrating the life of the deceased — not those of their living relatives.

But what of gay male couples with a shared name? “The Mrs. Jones” would seem to miss entirely. “The Mres. Jones” mangles standard English plurals. What to do?The correct plural abbreviation is “Messrs.,” as it could also be “Mesdames” for the ladies. But you could also spell out “The Misters Bob and Thaddeus Jones.”

I don’t offer criticism to my grown kids about their parenting, as they are excellent parents. The kids are generally well-behaved. This dinnertime hassle is an anomaly, but I eat with them about once a week, so it’s a regular occurrence.

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