One Vogue writer opens up about their non-monogamous marriage.
, I felt a thrill that doesn’t often feature in monogamous relationships: the delight of a new body, the febrile loss of a particular kind of security, the rush of fear. I also felt a newfangled interest in our relationship from those close to us. This interest sometimes looked like support, and other times judgment.
Whenever someone close to you makes a seemingly out there life choice, it holds a mirror up to your own life. And the number of curious inquiries that came my way after we decided to open our marriage left me certain that I had done what I thought everyone, at least secretly, wants to do: fuck other people.
Monogamy was out in the swinging ’60s and ’70s, then it came back in the ’90s, then it was out again. Apparently—at least from what I’ve heard from my chic friends—monogamy is back, again. But ask others—myself included—and non-monogamy is the only way to be. After a while in this camp, I feel like monogamy is too much to expect.
Eventually our non-monogamous routine brought with it some complications. A year and a half after we’d made the decision to go non-monogamous, I was crying at a friend’s baby’s first birthday party while the sweet baby blew out their birthday candle because I had been ghosted by another lover. And there have been many days where the concerns of my friends have been justified.
There was a time when I thought monogamy was all I wanted. Years later I would think it moronic, the practice of philistines. Now, as the dust settles, it feels like we have moved beyond a monogamy/non-monogamy binary: both in my life, and culturally . Gone are the days of announcing
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