DEAR AMY: You often mention the need to exercise “compassionate detachment,” especially with adult children I need advice on how to make that shift There is a saying that being a parent is like havin
g your heart wander around the world without you, and it is so trueI have really improved in terms of not offering unsolicited advice and comments, but I constantly worry about choices they make and feel their pain possibly even more acutely than they do It is to the point where I often wake up in the middle of the night worrying
Developing loving and compassionate detachment is a process that involves a certain amount of realistic self-assessment Some people are temperamentally more inclined toward worry than others And any time your child struggles with serious health issues, this will trigger a wave of worryDoes your fretting serve your children, ease their pain, or soothe their wounds?
I often picture this powerful witnessing process as holding hands and walking together - neither leading nor being ledAnd once you truly understand that you don’t have to make the donuts, you will experience your most tender relationships in a new way
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